Death by Texting


Death is the common denominator between humans. It connects us all in a morbid way. We will all die, but we can often choose how we want to die. I hope that you will not take a step towards the tragic death by texting. No one is forcing you to die by texting. You can choose. Resist the urge to kill yourself and others through text.

(The dude sitting next to me in the library keeps peeping over. He thens speaks to me, "Umm, what is death by texting? I don't get it. Texts cannot actually kill you." Oh how nice it must be to ignorant of the truth.) 

Death by texting is a cognitive decision to limit all communication to text. This choice imposes a series of problems for individuals: text cannot convey the real message, emotions, or feeling behind the words. This can create some serious mis-communication. With all of this mis-communication going on, it suddenly turns into a text battle.... and that it just childish. For some reason people feel like they can say whatever they want over text. Suddenly the people who avoid confrontation become a beast, like they have a license to talk some major smack. Everyone knows that is up to Mr. T.

Speaking of people saying whatever they think, late night texting is DANGEROUS. Pure insanity. Stupidity. What are some other words that go along with that? Dumb? That is what it is, just not smart, and it causes some issues. Let me paint you a picture. Late at night. You are feeling a little lonely, probably because you just watched a gooey love movie, followed up by listening to Marvin Gaye, and were thinking of your lost puppy. Out of the blue you think of this person you've been crushing on for awhile. A thought bores itself out of your illogical side of your brain (know as J.S.B) and says, "Text em. Tell em that you are thinking about them." What you don't hear is the evil laugh of the thought as it leaves. The evil thought goes back to his side of the brain, known as Jason, the illogical side, and tells all of his friends about how he just burned you. They all have a good laugh. Jason loves screwing you. If you are a woman, that side of the brain is called Candice.

You text them. You say you miss them, in words that really do not do justice to the type of person you are. Like the words 'booty', 'baby', and 'hunny'. Those words automatically cheapen the text, and make the other person feel like a stack of meat. You can't back out of it either. What are you going to say, "it was my buddy".... That text is permanently in their text history. They can read it over and over.... and they never have to respond. See? There it is, you are not getting their natural response. Problem.

Just as I was writing this post I got a text from this girl I haven't talked to in FOREVER. I invited her to come and see me. She said "I'm good. HAHA". Hold up. "I'm good. HAHA" First of all, she texted me first. I was just trying to be cute. Then she tells me she is good? Oh, nice to meet you good... Wait...no, you are not. You just iced me. You are not good, you are an ice queen. Secondly, did she really laugh that hard. Like HAHA? Maybe a chuckle or hehe, shoot I would take 'lol' rather than a 'HAHA'. Are you the Joker? Oh, I am some kind of comedian now? I wasn't making a joke. Would she do that in person? Or on the phone? Imagine that!

Wanna kick it?
I'm good. HAHA.

OHHHH! No you didn't! I really hope next time you text me I can just go, "I'm good. HAHAHAHA!" Laugh it up like a maniac. How do you like that? Oh, you don't? I'm sorry that I'm good and you're a friggin jokester. I didn't think you were for reals...

Getting back to what I am trying to say, limit your texting. It is cool for short little stuff, but we have forgotten that our vocal cords work. They actually function. 

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