She Dragon.

There was this girl the other day, on campus, who had an extreme amount of eyeshadow. It was so bright, that I almost mistook her face for a neon sign. Too much of a good thing can be bad, and in this case, it was. She had the Dragon eyes; which is a red flag. Initially, she might seem appealing, but when you dig deeper, you know there is a story to be told. As in our case, Shrek provides the story, doctrine, and principle of the 'She Dragon'.

"Dragon is never given a proper name in the [Shrek] films. Her fire can melt metal in seconds, such as Prince Charming's sword in the third film. She has a taste for knights, her favorite dish. She even has a recipe book for preparing them for dinner. In the first film, Dragon is charged with guarding Princess Fiona in her isolated castle, and is therefore initially seen by Shrek and Donkey as an antagonist. While Shrek tries to rescue the princess, Donkey finds himself at the mercy of Dragon. However, in terror, he successfully, but unintentionally, wins her over. Shrek and Donkey manage to escape with Fiona, leaving Dragon behind. Dragon returns later in the film, having escaped the volanic keep, and reunites with Donkey. She flies him and Shrek to Duloc to prevent Fiona marrying Lord Farquaad, whom she later eats. Dragon and Donkey begin a relationship, and at the end of the film, when Shrek and Fiona get married, Fiona tosses her bouquet and Dragon catches it. She looks over at Donkey, who then looks at Shrek with surprise and slight terror. After Shrek nods to Donkey, giving them his blessing, Donkey accepts Dragon as his mate," (taken from Wikipedia). Then they make some kind of ugly flying jackass. The end.

Women, with dragon eyes, are like the dragon. Initially, violent, even willing to murder. Which can be attractive, even fun, I guess. Somehow, in their insanity, the dragon woman will fall in love with you. However, you did nothing to promote that feeling, nor did you reciprocate that feeling. You were merely interested. You are forced, not by the laws of nature or love, rather the laws of submission, to give into them. If you do not, they will eat you; they love eating people. In the end, you will make ugly looking babies. 

When you see a woman with dragon eyes, you become interested. When you become interested, you say too much. When you say too much, you get into trouble. When you get into trouble, you get end up in a commitment. When you have a commitment, you make rash decisions. And when you make rash decisions, you wake up to an ugly baby. Stop making rash decisions. Don't look at women with dragon eyes.

NOTE: I do not have any real experience in this field. But I know a many men who have fallen to this con. Thanks to their experiences, I have dodged that bullet. Her eyes tell the story. And she either has F.P. or the murder gene, for sure.

Does it really make a diff?

I'm going to pull a Thoreau here and preach from my soap box, and be really pompous. BTW, the dude was a total douche.

Abbreviating words that do not need to be abbreviated is slothful. Are we so tied up with time that we really have to drop the last syllable when we talk? Not to exagg, but the only person who can drop off the last syllable is a man with a rope squeezing the life out of him. Wait, OR, Taylor Launter.Who has the gall, the audacity, the nerve to do that? A snooki. 

Blood, Cleavage, and Darkness, all found in spook alley...

I have not been a fan of Halloween for over 10 years. Mom wanted us to go trick-or-treating, but I didn't want to. I just dressed up to look like my older brother, Scott and called it good. That was the last time I dressed up for Halloween. That was the last straw, and decided to be my own man. Since that day I have been trying to figure out why I hate this "fun" holiday. Can we agree on one thing, it is a weird holiday. I'm not even sure where the tradition came from. I heard that Halloween comes from Ireland. They used to carve turnips and dress up. Then I heard Halloween came from the carnival celebration in Spain, in honor of the dead. The problem with this holiday, as with most holidays, we have created so many new traditions that the original idea (which I am not even sure what that is... I didn't check Wikipedia) and holiday has been all but abandoned.

One new tradition (feel free to correct me) is the obsession with the scary side of Halloween. I truly dislike the blood, carnage, and all creepy things associated with Halloween. Where do people get this passion for looking like they have been mutilated or decapitated? The most common costume is the vampire and zombie; both kill and use humans for food. That is really fun and cool. I wish I was like that.... Demented beings that must be servants of the devil. Then again Michael did a really good job. 

Then you have those haunted houses and scary movies....evil and gross. Call me a party pooper, but personally I don't find either of those things fun in the slightest. People dressed up in masks, covered in blood, walking up on you, or blocking your way, just moving in an ominous way, then others scream and yell... or are crawling on the ground, like they are going to grab your feet. It is true, that usually I want to pay some fee to go into a place that makes me uncomfortable. (Personally I think the Catholic church got that figured out... you know... paying for... oh never mind.) Then again, I can just go on a date. But haunted houses give a fear that isn't fun. Going on a roller coaster - fun fear. Getting scared - Crappy fear. 

Then at night, after the partying is over, everyone wants to watch a scary movie. The only reason I can even watch a scary movie is because they are so surreal that it is hard not to watch, like an accident, or looking at Jocelyn Wildenstein. Then when I'm home, all alone, it's dark inside, I get out my shotgun and sleep with it in my bed for fear that leatherface is gunna come get me. 


Maybe I just hate dressing up. I think some costumes are really clever. I saw Joaquin Phoenix, Alan Garner, Tim Lincecum, and even an Avatar. Then, as with all things, I saw the opposite-- obtuse. I don't think that word does justice to what I saw. Immodest? Perhaps, totally inappropriate? Girls were dressed as sluts and boys as gigolos. Notice that I said girls and boys... cause that is their maturity; an adolescent who is foolish and insecure. The whole episode of the howl was very telling of people's inner commitment to a moral code. I may sound judgmental, I guess I am, but I think that when people claim to live a certain lifestyle their actions and dress should mirror what they "believe" and "preach." I do not feel that the excuse, "It's Halloween right? We're just having fun!" works. Justification is the grease on the slippery pole to hell. All I am saying is walk the walk. And even if they do not have the predominate set of moral codes, they should at least wait to get dirty behind closed doors, isn't that a given? At least respect the individuals around you enough. I wondered if people misinterpreted where we were. A gymnasium is not a brothel or a private bedroom. Big Ben made a similar mistake as to where he should act like a "boy". 


Overall I think Halloween is a dark day. The traditions that come with Halloween are not uplifting. Look at all of the other holidays, they are fun, filled with joy and laughter... maybe not president's day... but at least it's patriotic. Halloween is nothing more than a carved facade that is disturbing. Cakes are decorated with realistic looking fingers and eyeballs. Orange and black, dreadful colors, intertwine themselves everywhere. Blood smears itself on the faces of ugly candy eaters. Horror is sought after like a destructive drug. Standards are surrendered to the darkness that engulf the night. Halloween is the worst holiday of them all. But Nevada day makes up for it.